We’ve answered 24 reader questions up to now, and at present we’d like to do it once more. Listed here are three extra, together with tips on how to refresh your own home on a finances and be a superb listener…
Q. “What are you sporting this summer time? I favored final summer time’s post about what the CoJ team was into and need to know what everybody’s sporting this yr, too.” — Ursula
A. We’d like to do an up to date model of that put up! However in the meantime, whereas trying via previous photographs (why does iPhoto at all times serve up essentially the most heart-tugging reminiscences?), I noticed that each summer time I’ve one MVP informal black costume that I put on again and again — to dinner with pals, for bike rides, on the playground, on journeys, all over the place. I keep in mind, in England final summer time, I felt sloppy and jet-lagged, and I turned into a black denim costume, and my elegant aunt mentioned, “Jo, you’re abruptly trying fairly stylish!” Proof {that a} LBD at all times saves the day. Listed here are 4 that will really feel nice this summer time: shirtdress, linen, gingham, and midi.
Q. “I like Cup of Jo house tours and need our dwelling to really feel vibrant, however we don’t have an enormous finances. What are design concepts on a budget that we are able to use to make our home really feel extra like ‘us’? I’d be without end grateful.” — Z.
A. Pricey Z., enable me to re-introduce the fakeover, aka a makeover you do just by transferring round stuff you already personal. Take into account turning your couch to face a brand new path, for instance; or swap paintings between rooms. I’ve been amazed by what an enormous distinction a little bit futzing could make. One other straightforward vibe shift is to hang family photos. They’ll make you smile, they usually’re free!
Or, when you’d like to vary the colour scheme or add texture, go for dwelling equipment as a substitute of pricey new furnishings. Within the photographs above, I took our gray couch and added 4 pillows from Article (a well-priced model I like) — gold, velvet, sheepskin, blue — plus, contemporary flowers from the deli. Increase! The nook now feels tremendous inviting for curling up with a guide or having an extended gossipy chat with a pal. Such a simple and pleasant technique to swap issues up. (I additionally love this twinkly table lamp, which makes our home really feel MAGICAL at evening.) Good luck!
Q. A few of my pals have gone via onerous instances not too long ago (being pregnant loss, divorce…), and whereas I need to be there for them, I don’t know what to say and find yourself performing awkward. One other pal instructed me up to now that I generally focus an excessive amount of on the constructive aspect throughout onerous conversations. The very last thing I need to do is make a pal really feel unheard or unloved. Any suggestions for being a protected place can be drastically appreciated.” — Beena
A. Oh my gosh, Beena, that is such a superb query! And I’d love to listen to from the CoJ hive thoughts on what has labored for others. I’d say that three phrases that at all times really feel good to listen to are: “Thanks for telling me” and “That sounds actually onerous” and “Inform me extra.” Usually you merely need to share your ideas and really feel understood, and a listening ear is a reward. Once I referred to as my dad after my stepfather died final December, and I burst into tears, he mentioned, “I perceive” in a delicate voice a number of instances whereas I talked and cried. I truthfully will always remember that decision and the way a lot it meant to me. It doesn’t must be sophisticated to be significant. You sound like a superb pal for simply asking this query.
A lot of like to everybody, and please weigh in beneath! Additionally, be happy to go away questions within the feedback for future columns, when you’d like. xoxo
P.S. More reader questions, and five ways to be a good listener.
(Front room photographs by Christine Han.)
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