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If He Has a Girlfriend Why Does He Need Me? 15 Huge Causes

by scorpiomagazine
March 18, 2023
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So you are feeling a reference to a man in your life. 

You two have the very best conversations, there’s apparent chemistry, and also you assume the 2 of you can make an awesome couple.

Then he drops the bombshell: he has a girlfriend.

Your coronary heart sinks, and your goals of being collectively fade away. 

You marvel why he acted so romantically with you if there was no likelihood of a future.

Understanding what to do on this scenario might be difficult, particularly if he’s nonetheless pursuing you and making strikes.

Fortunately, there are frequent explanation why a man may let you know he has a girlfriend, and these may help you resolve easy methods to transfer ahead within the relationship.

So let’s dive into the chances of why a man may chase you when he’s not single in an effort to make sense of the scenario.

Can A Man Like You Even If He Has a Girlfriend?

It’s fairly doable a man can such as you and nonetheless have a girlfriend.

It’s not one thing we normally tackle, particularly in monogamous relationships, however individuals typically have emotions (starting from fleeting to long-lasting) for somebody aside from their associate.

There are numerous totally different outcomes of a situation like this:

  • He entertains the concept as a fantasy and lets it go
  • His attraction continues to develop, and he retains it quiet
  • He discusses the scenario along with his girlfriend/a therapist/a trusted supply to actually work by his emotions
  • He lets you understand how he feels in confidence however doesn’t wish to act on it
  • He desires to pursue one thing with you whereas nonetheless being along with his present girlfriend
  • He leaves his associate and continues to pursue you

It may be laborious to foretell the result of this example. Males are likely to take care of their attraction to a different lady primarily based on their social conditioning and previous patterns.

For instance, if a person has been cheated on up to now, he might justify hiding his emotions for others from his associate as a result of he’s terrified of the identical factor taking place to him once more.

Find out how to Inform If a Man Likes You When He Has a Girlfriend

There are some frequent indicators when deciphering if an connected man likes you. They aren’t too far off from the indicators we see in a single man, but it surely’s essential to pay attention to the extra context right here.

Listed here are some clues which will recommend he has emotions for you:

  • He acts otherwise round you than different individuals
  • He compliments you typically
  • He goes out of his manner that will help you
  • He asks you out on dates
  • He tries to spend time with you when he’s accessible
  • He pays consideration and remembers belongings you inform him
  • His body language is suggestive of attraction
  • He talks about his relationship with you

These indicators could possibly be purely platonic.

However in the event you’re noticing many of those indicators without delay, then it’s completely doable he has a crush on you.

If He Has a Girlfriend, Why Does He Need Me? 15 Sturdy Causes to Contemplate

1. There’s an Plain Chemistry

Generally it’s laborious to place a finger on it – we simply really feel like we wish to be round that individual. It might really feel prefer it’s past our management. A person might really feel an irresistible pull to be around you, even when it’s not logical in any respect. 

woman trying to prevent boyfriend from looking at another girl if he has a girlfriend why does he want me

You’ll discover him standing subsequent to you in social conditions, reaching out frequently, and possibly even gazing at you when he thinks you’re not trying.

2. He’s Unhappy with His Accomplice

Simply because he’s in a relationship doesn’t imply it’s assembly his wants or satisfying him.

Whether or not he feels uncared for, unheard, or taken without any consideration, he’s searching for your validation and emotional help. On this manner, you’re filling the gaps in his present relationship.

3. He’s Avoiding Dedication

Discovering a associate prepared and in a position to decide to a relationship totally isn’t any small feat. So it’s not stunning that many males get chilly ft once they begin getting severe in a relationship.

Getting curious about another person helps to deflect from the dedication he’s been avoiding.

He might benefit from the easiness of flirting with you over making laborious choices, resembling if he’s going to maneuver in along with his associate or quiet down with children.

4. He Has Low Confidence and Self-Esteem

If a person has low-self esteem in his relationship, he might search this from others. It could possibly be as a result of his present associate doesn’t frequently make him really feel valued or cherished.

However it could additionally don’t have anything to do along with her and will consequence from a deep inside wrestle about his worthiness.

In the event you discover a man is fishing for compliments and continuously searching for consideration when he’s with you, this can be a main motive for his flirtatious habits.

5. You’ve Each Shaped a Sturdy Emotional Bond

Perhaps you and this man have gone by one thing collectively, resembling attaining a serious life milestone, working intensely on a undertaking collectively, and even experiencing a tragedy, such because the lack of a detailed buddy.

Sure experiences can create an intense emotional bond between two individuals, and he might not be capable to assist however really feel interested in you.

6. There’s A Lot of Bodily Stress and Attraction

Relating to being the correct bodily “sort” and having a robust attraction, we are able to’t all the time management our emotions.

In the event you completely match the invoice for what he finds enticing and there’s a whole lot of bodily chemistry, it may be laborious to withstand.

officemates being touchy with each other if he has a girlfriend why does he want me

You two may additionally have been in conditions that brought about a whole lot of bodily contact – as an example, lengthy hugs, dance nights, and many others. These cases may end up in an intense bodily bond and need for sexual connection.

7. He’s Bored In His Present Relationship

Stability is important in a relationship, however an excessive amount of can result in stagnation and tedium.

If he’s been with the identical individual for some time they usually’ve been caught in the identical patterns, it is sensible why he could also be tempted by somebody new.

If that is so, you’re doubtless very totally different from his present associate. Chances are you’ll do issues that he needs his present girlfriend would. As an alternative of bringing life into his present relationship, he’s exploring it with you.


Extra Associated Articles

Does He Get Defensive When You Tell How You Feel? Learn Why + 15 Ways to Handle It

Has Your Boyfriend Lost Interest In You Sexually? 11 Reasons Why And What To Do About It

All You Need To Know About the 3 Types of Men Who Have Affairs


8. Communication Is Missing in His Present Relationship

Communication is the muse of a wholesome relationship. If he’s not getting sufficient from his present associate, then it is sensible why he could also be drawn to you for dialog and connection. 

Chances are you’ll hear him vent to you about numerous relationship issues, which exhibits that he doesn’t have the area to work them out along with his girlfriend.

9. He’s Jealous Of His Accomplice

Perhaps this man’s girlfriend is interested in different individuals, and he can’t assist however feel jealous. This might make him really feel insecure or like his relationship is threatened. 

He might flip to you for consideration in order that he can increase his personal shallowness. That is extra about utilizing you to make him really feel higher than being genuinely curious about you.

10. He Does It Simply As a result of He Can

It sounds harsh, however typically an opportunistic man will flirt with you just because he can get away with it. It’s all about pushing boundaries for this man, and it’s an enormous energy play for him. 

Morals don’t come into query, and he merely goals to “win” the scenario as if it had been a recreation.

When a man tells you he has a girlfriend, doesn’t categorical any regret or emotions of guilt, and nonetheless continues to flirt with you, it is a fairly clear signal that he’s doing it simply to reap the benefits of you and his girlfriend.

11. He’s Not Suitable With His Accomplice

Even when this man loves his girlfriend, it could be doable that she’s not the correct match for him.

He is probably not sexually interested in her, have totally different values than her, or just know in his coronary heart that she’s not the one. Naturally, if this isn’t addressed, his emotions will develop elsewhere.

12. He’s Trying For a Approach Out

If this man is aware of he desires to depart the connection however isn’t courageous sufficient to do it outright, he might strive sabotaging it by flirting with you.

In his thoughts, this will likely be a neater strategy to finish the connection than simply instantly telling her he’s not pleased and desires out.

couple wearing workout clothes talking if he has a girlfriend why does he want me

On this case, he doesn’t actually care about getting caught. Actually, he hopes that his girlfriend will discover out in order that he can keep away from having to be the one to interrupt up.

13. There Are Outdated Emotions Between The Two Of You

Perhaps you and this man have a historical past. There might have been a crush earlier than, or you will have even dated. If this was the case, he may nonetheless be drawn to you. 

Chances are you’ll remind him of the “good outdated days” everytime you hang around, and it looks like strolling down reminiscence lane.

This fantasy of the previous could make it laborious for him to remain dedicated in his present relationship.

14. He’s Searching for a Thrill

Doing one thing taboo or illicit might be an thrilling expertise for some. If he’s an “adrenaline junkie,” he’ll prioritize discovering experiences that get his coronary heart racing over logical or moral approaches. 

Every time he’s with you, the truth that he might get caught at any second provides an additional layer of pleasure and thrill.

15. He Doesn’t Have Relationship Boundaries

Some males don’t have a transparent sense of boundaries regarding relationships. If he’s used to getting away with flirting proper in entrance of his girlfriend, then it is sensible that he would proceed this habits with different girls as nicely.

He might exhibit narcissist traits, resulting in him solely contemplating his personal wants and disregarding everybody else’s emotions.

Narcissistic habits might be very damaging, so it’s essential to create your personal boundaries round individuals like this.

Is It Unsuitable to Go Out with Him If He Has a Girlfriend?

“We love one another, however he has a girlfriend,” you might sob to your folks. It’s straightforward to really feel like a sufferer or somebody with out the ability to make your personal alternative once you’re the opposite lady.

However the accountability is as a lot yours as it’s his to make the correct choices on this situation.

Make sure, and there are execs and cons relying on the route you are taking.

Listed here are some factors to contemplate in the event you’re occupied with coming into a relationship with somebody who has a associate:

  • You’ll by no means be capable to belief him totally: It could possibly be tough to belief him completely as a result of he was untrue in his present relationship. Broken belief is particularly prevalent when a man doesn’t let you know he has a girlfriend within the first place.
  • Chances are you’ll harm extra individuals than you assume: If his girlfriend has a baby or depends on him for help, then coming into a relationship with him could cause vital ache to individuals you’re not even connected to.
  • It’s doable that he’ll cheat on you: If he’s keen to cheat on his associate, then he might do the identical with you.
  • There’s not a lot likelihood for a long-term future: How will you plan a life collectively when he hasn’t totally dedicated to leaving his present relationship? It’s laborious to think about an enduring future if one among you is holding again.

We should be trustworthy with ourselves and our emotions in these tough conditions. As well as, we have now to contemplate the emotional influence this example might have on the opposite concerned events.

If we select to pursue somebody with a girlfriend, we’re primarily selecting between two individuals, which may carry a heavy emotional toll for everybody concerned.

What to Do If You Like Every Different, However He Has a Girlfriend

Realizing that you’ve got emotions for somebody who’s already taken generally is a tough and complicated scenario.

Although it could not appear doable, there are methods to navigate this tough terrain and preserve your integrity intact. 

Respect His Relationship

It’s essential to respect this man’s dedication to his girlfriend. Even when he’s flirting and spending time with you, it doesn’t imply it is best to disregard his relationship.

Acknowledge that they’re in a relationship and chorus from any habits that might result in its destruction.

Say No To Flirting

As tempting as it could be, don’t interact in flirtatious habits with him if he has a girlfriend. Flirting will solely complicate the scenario and create emotions of guilt and dishonesty.

If he’s flirting with you, politely inform him you aren’t curious about pursuing one thing past friendship.

Don’t Lead Him On

Don’t give him false hope by leading him to imagine that one thing may occur between the 2 of you.

It will solely harm his girlfriend and make it tougher for him to remain true to her. Be trustworthy about your emotions, even whether it is tough or uncomfortable.

Discuss It Out With Him

You probably have developed emotions for this man, speaking about it with him is essential to clear the air. Focus on your feelings and the way his relationship impacts you.

It will enable each of you to precise yourselves brazenly and actually, which may profit you in the long term.

Get Assist

Having emotions for somebody who has a girlfriend might be very complicated. Make sure that to talk with individuals you belief and get help out of your family members.

It will make it easier to keep grounded and make more healthy choices sooner or later. A therapist may also make it easier to parse out your emotions and information you on easy methods to transfer ahead.

Create Wholesome Boundaries

Creating wholesome boundaries with this man is important to guard your self and his relationship. Ensure that your interactions with him revolve round friendship and nothing extra.

In the event you do wish to transfer ahead with him, set a boundary you can’t do till he’s communicated it along with his present girlfriend and is actively leaving that relationship.

If he’s unwilling to do that, use boundaries to interrupt off any non-platonic habits or shut down contact altogether.

Setting limits will assist be certain that the scenario doesn’t get out of hand and that you just respect everybody concerned as a lot as doable.

Closing Ideas

It’s not straightforward to navigate a scenario once you like somebody who has a girlfriend. However by higher understanding why he’s appearing this fashion, you possibly can resolve probably the most compassionate method for all events concerned. 

With honesty and respect, you possibly can really feel empowered to create wholesome boundaries and guarantee nobody will get harm.

Is someone taken on you? Then you might've asked yourself, "if he has a girlfriend, why does he want me?" Read this to find out the answer.



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